Saturday April 9

I'm continueing to feel better everyday.  I have visited the hospital and a few friends around town.  I'm still struggling with building up my stamina after being so sick, but it will improve with time.

Since I haven't been doing rounds at the hospital I have very little to write.  I'll just leave you with a few Ghana facts...

1) Love is a luxery that most women don't have a chance to experience.  There is a practice called "bride swap" that used to be very prevalent in this part of Ghana.  Thankfully, dedicated people have worked to eradicate this practice and it has decreased considerably.  Here is how a bride swap works...apparently baby girls are promised to men who are 20 years their senior.  The man may give a certain number of animals per year to the father until the girl is of age.  When the girl reaches her mid-teens she is sent to marry the man.  If she refuses she could be killed as this would shame the entire family.  If the girl runs away with a lover then they are both at risk of death.  What I don't understand is why a man would want a wife who is 20 years younger than him.  Why would he want to wait until his 40s for a wife?  I asked a friend this and he said the men are very promiscuious during the years they are waiting for the girl to mature.  When I asked "who are the men sleeping with if all of the girls are promised?"  His answer was that the girls could sleep with whoever they wanted before their marriage.  They could have as many lovers as they wanted as long as they ended up marrying the man their father had made the arrangement with.  I guess this system makes sense to someone...certainly not me.  At least this practice has fallen out of favor.

There is another practice called "sister swap".  This practice is not set up by the fathers but by the girl's brother.  If one man is attracted to a woman he will ask his friend if he could swap his sister for her.  Once again the girl has no choice.

2) Polygamy is alive and well in northern Ghana.  Many men have at least 2 wives.  It is also common to have a girlfriend in a nearby village.  I have gotten to know several women but I have never heard them mention their husbands.  Nikki asked on woman where her husband was and she said in another town.  Nikki asked if he would come back to live with her and she said "No, this is Africa.  Out of sight out of mind".  This woman had two children and she never expected to see the father. 

I'm just thankful that I live in a culture where women are valued and my father encourages me to choose my husband.